There has been a shift in the usual gender roles; a man or a woman is not only a biological being but also a sample of particular features. The search for social harmony, acceptance of one’s strengths and weaknesses are acute global problems. Nowadays, people’s problems are caused by imposed stereotypes, labels, and mistaken ideas about roles and responsibilities. According to Slaughter and Dorment, humanity must find ways to smooth out social conflicts and balance the ratio of forces and capabilities. Slaughter, in her article, maintains that women and men can “have everything” and “have it all at the same time” (Graff 538); everyone should get what they deserve. Dorment urges people to fight for what they want (Graff 573); there is always a choice, and only a person decides what to do. Furthermore, he states, “Man, woman, whoever: Get a shovel and start digging” (Graff 572); everyone is equal, and gender does not matter if one can perform the work qualitatively. To find genuine, authentic answers to the question, one should resort to more advanced research methods; detailed information selection, analysis, and data research are required in identifying solutions to problems. If humanity is ready to fight against injustice, it is necessary to focus on the causes and consequences of prejudice, understand the data received, and draw certain conclusions.
Finding a balance between work and family, earnings, and expenses, and compliance with public standards is one of the most critical aspects today. Nowadays, a person is under pressure from society; a man must work and earn more, take responsibility, and on the contrary, a woman is obliged to conduct household chores. In the article “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All”, Dorment argues that “the concept of work-life balance is strongly gendered” (Graff 569). By focusing on the ratio of the time spent on work or what a person likes, Dorment overlooks the deeper problem of modern reality and the ambiguous picture of the world. Therefore, the arguments about acting do not stop — choosing a job, a family, or combining everything. Eventually, “work-life balance” is essential for a productive personal and professional life, and sometimes it depends not on personal priorities but more on “global” aspects. Slaughter states that one “would do well to frame work-family balance in terms of the broader social and economic issues that affect both women and men (Graff 551).” Thus, creating harmony requires people to consciously act to change a situation and develop new strategies; one must even sacrifice something. People exhaust themselves, try to go ahead, and get unsatisfactory results, so it is crucial to learn to listen to oneself and heart, to reflect on values and beliefs.
In his work, Dorment raises the problem that these days people are constantly in a rush, therefore, it is complicated to understand whether we have it all or not. He concentrates the attention on the issue of men spending more time at work and “earning money,” which is why they need to implement the “work-life balance” system more than women. According to Dorment, by working extra hours on the job, the man provides the financial cover demanded by the family so that the woman can spend more time with the kids (Graff 561). The author explains the division of responsibilities in modern families based on the number of working hours. Therefore, the arguments on the topic do not stop: whether men should be more and more involved in the household or women should build their careers. Both authors agree that the creation of a balanced ‘work-life’ ratio demands reconsideration of the person’s priorities in life and a schedule with listed responsibilities and obligations to plan the time spent with their children.
Dorment argues that nowadays, more and more men get involved in the process of managing their “work-life” ratio. He claims that it is a common thing when men help women with their household routine, spend more time with their families, and participate in the educational process of their children. In the article “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All”, Dorment provides an example depicting the rational and equal amount of household tasks, a family where duties are split 50-50, which is a shock for older generations (Graff 563). Slaughter agrees with the statement, as her own life is an example of a reverse to the stereotypical thinking “work-life balance” system. As an example of men paying more attention to household duties can be provided Slaughter’s life during two years of her work in Washington. Slaughter’s husband carried out almost all the duties, such as taking kids to school or cleaning the house (Graff 538). Men equally as women may perform household duties and work less to have more leisure time, however, Dorment agrees that women are more expected to spend time with their children. Society is judgemental, and every action performed will be estimated by others, but those social stereotypes need to be changed to build the appropriate “work-life” ratio.
Anne-Marie Slaughter depicts love as a significant criterion taken into consideration by planning the workload and an index estimated by society. It is shown in her article through the examples of women who take breaks from work to spend dinner-time in the family circle as an act of love (Graff 545). Slaughter explains that women are more often expected to concentrate on their families when men, on the opposite, are seen as “money earners”, therefore, they are anticipated to spend less time at home. On the love issue, Dorment’s and Slaughter’s opinions differ regarding working men. Slaughter claims that society supposes that men love their families less as they longer stay at work. However, Dorment states that having extra working hours does not make men bad fathers, as well as women who spend less time at work, are not held for slackers (Graff 561). Both authors explain how men and women can separately manage their time and argue that people usually have families, therefore schedules often cannot be created without their families’ influence.
I prefer Dorment’s approach to the problem because he argues on the issue from men’s position and tries to break stereotypes regarding working men and the time spent with their families. In my opinion, it is a positive moment that the author does not concentrate only on men but pays attention to working women as well. In Dorment’s article, the equality between men and women is represented better than in Slaughter’s paper, where she mostly concentrates on women. From my point of view, this is one of the core ideas that need to be present in every work related to this problem. Dorment explains that although there are different stereotypes about men and women, the work-life balance issue cannot be considered separately for both genders. Society can take Dorment’s ideas as the basis of their future time planning, and by managing the number of hours both men and women spend at work and with their families.
Works Cited
Dorment, Richard. “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All.” Esquire, 2013.
Graff, Gerald, et al. “They Say / I Say” with Readings. 5th ed., W. W. Norton & Company, 2021.
Slaughter, Anne-Marie. “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All.” The Atlantic, 2012.