Introduction
At a time when everyone is striving for self-improvement and personal growth, Ottessa Moshfegh shows the other side of this process. Her story, Bettering Myself, is not a failure’s path to success but the inner development of a character with varying degrees of success. Moshfegh challenges readers to question the true meaning of improvement and whether it occurs in the individual or the eyes of others. At the same time, the author emphasizes that personal growth and self-improvement are impossible without the participation of other people or external circumstances. Therefore, this paper analyzes how the protagonist’s meeting with her ex-husband catalyzed her self-improvement.
Analysis of the Story Title
Even though Ottessa Moshfegh’s story is called Bettering Myself, the real ‘bettering’ of the main character begins towards the end. The author herself notes that this story is about “a woman who turns inward and is self-destructive” (Rowlands para. 2). As a teacher who, by definition, should set a good example for her students, Miss Mooney is far from being an example of morality. She abused alcohol and “kept a down-filled sleeping bag in a cardboard box in the back of the room” to sleep between classes (Moshfegh 2). Moreover, she has not achieved success in work or her personal life, and her life is going downhill.
Initially, it may seem that the fate of this character is predetermined, and nothing will improve her situation. Even though the protagonist’s transformation is not fully depicted in the story, the author gives enough hints about it. The catalyst and the main reason for Miss Mooney’s change is her meeting with her ex-husband.
On the one hand, it is ironic because people often understand development and self-improvement as a movement into the future to the new and not a return to the old. The main character saw this meeting as an opportunity to prove to others that she was victorious (Czyzniejewski para. 5). On the other hand, such a development of events seems quite natural. Many people want to prove to their exes that they have become more successful after a breakup. That is why the meeting with the ex-husband becomes a catalyst for the development and self-improvement of the main character.
Analysis of the Story Climax
First Stage: Before Meeting
Considering the meeting of the main character with her ex-husband as the climax, it is possible to divide this episode into three stages. The first stage is the preparation for the meeting, during which the character, probably realizing she does not look her best, tries to put herself in order. She went in for sports, bought new clothes and shoes, cut her hair, put on makeup, and did everything she could to make an excellent visual impression (Moshfegh 10). However, this is only the impression she wants to make on those around her.
At the same time, the actual development occurs—moreover, all these actions are aimed at distracting and escaping from reality. Characters who avoid meeting their true selves are characteristic of Moshfegh’s work (Cohen para. 1). Throughout the story, the main character only briefly demonstrates her true personality, not clouded by alcohol and not hiding behind the ostentatiousness that was filled with Miss Mooney’s meeting with her ex-husband.
Second Stage: Meeting
During their meeting, the protagonist’s ex-husband tries in every way to show his superiority. From the first minute, he noticed she looked tired and demonstrated his higher financial position (Moshfegh 12). Miss Mooney is aware that her ex continues to live his own life and feels happy surrounded by a new wife and children. Therefore, through their interaction, the main character’s vulnerability is visible.
Despite her alcoholism and dissolute lifestyle, Miss Mooney created the image of a self-sufficient woman, which she was seen at work before this meeting. It seemed that earlier, the protagonist managed to isolate herself from everyone and demonstrate only those aspects of her life that she wanted (Finch para. 5). However, under the onslaught of her ex-husband, the mask of success and happiness created by the protagonist crumbles. Her decision to walk away from the meeting is a watershed in character development, during which Miss Mooney realizes that the image she has created for others can quickly crumble and real inner change is needed.
Third Stage: After Meeting
After this comes the third stage of the climax, during which no positive changes appear in the character. The protagonist does many impulsive acts, such as the use of alcohol and cocaine and promiscuity, which are also part of the character’s development (Moshfegh 14). The author herself notes that “drugs in fiction are just an excuse to push their internal worlds into places that are more delusional” (Rowlands para. 6).
Therefore, her actions reflect her struggle to reconcile her desire for self-improvement with her deep-seated insecurities and emotional turmoil resulting from the failed encounter. Writing a letter to the school’s principal is another example of the main character striving for change and self-improvement but not knowing where to start. At the same time, the internal struggle in the character may not be evident to her or the reader.
Ultimately, the reader does not see an improved version of the main character. Nevertheless, an encounter with a homeless man saying “Pray for rain” and the character’s decision to tear up the letter gives hope for a better future for her (Moshfegh 15). The greatest ‘bettering’ of the character is the realization that improvements do not have to be visible to others but must be felt by the person. This insight, received by the protagonist, is probably the improvement the author spoke of when she gave the title to the story. However, understanding this would not have been possible without the catalyst, the meeting with the ex-husband.
Conclusion
In conclusion, Bettering Myself leads the reader to think about self-improvement. Even though the author does not say how Miss Mooney’s life has changed, the story’s ending suggests that the protagonist will try not to return to the old way of life. However, the heroine realizes that self-improvement is not about appearance but inner balance. For a long time, the protagonist drowned out her personality with alcohol and drugs, but the end of the story allowed her to start living in a new way.
Works Cited
Cohen, Alina. “Ottessa Moshfegh Doesn’t Want to Write Moral Stories.” Observer, 2020. Web.
Czyzniejewski, Michael. “February 17, 2018: “Bettering Myself” by Ottessa Moshfegh.” Story366, 2018. Web.
Finch, Charles. “You’re probably wrong about Ottessa Moshfegh.” Los Angeles Times, 2020. Web.
Moshfegh, Ottessa. “Bettering Myself.” Homesick for Another World: Stories. Penguin Press, 2017, pp. 1-15.
Rowlands, Lili Owen. “In Conversation with Ottessa Moshfegh.” TANK Magazine, 2018. Web.