Essay 1
About a week ago, I witnessed how my Black friend refused to buy herself lunch because she was supposedly saving for something important. I recklessly suggested sharing mine, but her negative answer was firm, which was a stark contrast against the diminutive figure. Perhaps, it was always there, that resolute personality trapped in a small, fragile body that could go with the wind any moment. Instinctively, I hugged her, blaming myself for being unable to do more.
The situation made me think of Trump and his bulky appearance, which was the complete opposite of my friend’s. One could mute him and refuse to listen to those speeches, but that silhouette was inescapable. In a way, it served as a reminder that he was rich, full, and dominating, which my friend did not meet any criteria. Trump seemed to be from another dimension, alien to our values and struggles. Nobody from my circle had the same build: we all appeared malnourished in comparison, although everyone had usual meals, except the said friend. People believe that money is the root of all evil, but it is probably something different, seeing how other celebrities remain in shape.
Another reason could be gender: Trump is a man, so he has to be strong and daunting, while my friend is a woman, who a male partner will protect. Therefore, her small figure is fine, and the financial issues will evaporate due to that suitor having a stable and high-paying job. However, she does not believe in such fairytale-like stories; besides, relying on someone else would be against her principles.
That comparison invokes mixed feelings because a close person is struggling before my eyes, and a distant man is thriving while depriving immigrant children of having the same body build as his in the future. It is infuriating but also delightful because I believe that my friend will succeed and resume having lunches. People who have to sacrifice something for the greater good inspire admiration, unlike those ignorant of need and struggle. Surprisingly, I think that Trump supporters are more similar to my friend, yet they choose to identify with someone rich and successful. Meanwhile, not many would want to be a Black woman, but it is still a joy being one despite all obstacles.
Essay 2
While taking a stroll, I noticed a person wearing a white mask, which covered everything except their hazel eyes. The situation is reminiscent of what Gay (2020) experienced, although he was familiar with the other person (para. 1). They were a stranger, and it was hard to determine their gender, but the beauty of those eyes was undeniable. Nothing particularly hinted at the person being a man or a woman: the winter clothes seemed unisex, the hair was long, but it means nothing these days, and the height did not suggest much. Yet, I found their enigma attractive, even though they quickly left my life after buying a hot dog.
Ultimately, being unaware of that person’s gender does not bother me: I do not feel guilty for being attracted to them. It was an act of admiration, and people are somewhat insecure about admitting they like the way someone looks without ulterior motives. Although society accepts different sexualities, it does not necessarily tolerate men complimenting each other, pigeonholing them as gay even if they are straight. Some may disagree that such social practices are wrong, but as long as the majority supports that state of affairs, the previous example will probably be seen as deviant. Statements such as “I am not gay but…” before praising a member of the same sex sound as if they are absolving a person of guilt. The normalization of same-sex attraction might not be the final goal – people should learn to appreciate each other.
I could have accelerated my pace, reached that person, and told them that their eyes were beautiful to prove that I practice what I preach. I hesitated, but there was a reason for that – the mystery would vanish. They would probably reply to my compliment, and their voice would reveal… something. At first, I wanted to write gender but then realized that it would not necessarily be the case: if they were transgender, their voice might not be indicative of gender, and I would only make them uncomfortable, or they could have a lower or higher pitch than average. Thus, I find delight in refusing to approach them and preserving the mystery because that random attraction somehow made me feel liberated.
Reference
Gay, Ross. (2020). The joy of caring for others. The New York Times. Web.