When it comes to considering the role that emotions play in people’s lives, the latter usually agree with the point that these emotions are solely their reactions to external stimuli. In other words, the key idea of such perception consists in the one-sidedness of the emotions’ direction – a straight arrow from cause to effect. Bradberry and Greaves contradict this opinion in their bestseller named “Emotional Intelligence 2.0” and put emphasis on the power of emotions themselves; the authors teach how to control and manage the emotional constituents of our thoughts in order to make the behavior more rational in different types of either ordinary or critical situations.
To begin with, the essential peculiarity of the book is that the described techniques, which are intended to be applied for the enhancement of behavioral models, are wisely divided into four groups: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship strategies. In my opinion, this classification, despite being merely the frame of the book’s structure, was very helpful itself. The reason for that is that everybody has an individual level of each of these spheres’ development.
For example, there are people who successfully choose cunning and sophisticated strategies to rule their communication with others but fail to deal with the internal part of their personalities. The authors here highlight the comprehensive essence of the approach: “To truly improve your ability in the four emotional intelligence skills, you need to better understand each skill and what it looks like in action.” However, they at the same time make it very easy for the reader to decide what is the most important in his particular case and avoid scrolling the pages and seeking the desired part endlessly.
Personally, it was the most useful for me to scrutinize the social awareness section. I always felt like I understood myself pretty well but get lost when speaking to others, as long as the more people participate in the conversation, the more variables have to be taken into account. “What if?” – this was the question that always required an answer but never got one due to branching at every single node. Luckily, Bradberry and Greaves provided several strategies that are very easy to follow and apply.
One of these recommendations was to think of a reserve question before the talk starts. This aims to bypass all possible awkward situations that might appear because of continuous silence. Moreover, it is also an effective tip when the previous topic was not discussed successfully – then I can simply switch between them, having another one “in a pocket.”
Another suggestion consisted in trying to live in the moment of now. At first blush, it does not appear to have a strong connection with the world around and any social processes in it. However, if analyzed more deeply, it shows such hidden sights as behaving more confidently, which is an indisputable advantage of a person in a company. Indeed, when one participates actively in the conversation and shows a certain interest in the topic, others will definitely appreciate his attention.
To sum up, “Emotional Intelligence 2.0” is not just a book; it is a set of tools of different kinds and properties, and, as far as I am concerned, the authors’ main purpose was to show where this magic storeroom with instruments is and give the direct instructions for their usage.