After reading Jim Van Yperen’s book “Making Peace: A Guide to Overcoming Church Conflict,” I am convinced that the church is not always a place of reassurance and comfort. Sometimes, this community of believers is a battleground of evil – both literally and figuratively. While most people know that conflicts sometimes rock the church, they may not understand the extent of this issue if they are outsiders. Christians are somewhat successful in hiding their conflicts from the public unless these differences become too significant and unavoidable. Jim Van Yperen and similar others provide guidance that Christians can use to solve issues and maintain the image of the church as the representation of God through the Lordship of Jesus Christ to win more people to His Kingdom.
As the author rightfully contends, there are many possible causes of conflict in the church. But the most prominent of them is the serious disagreements among groups or individuals within the church (Van Yperen, 2008, p. 212). These differences may be superficial or border the real issues about what it means to be a Christian. I agree with the author that the best and only way to resolve these problems is to identify their root causes and deal with them effectively. Indeed, one of the reasons conflicts still abound in churches today is that believers only deal with symptoms – the superficial issues relating to conflicts.
Since the major cause of conflict in the church is individual and group disagreement, the best remedy is reconciliation. As the Bible in Jeremiah 6:16 says, “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.” Our problem is that while we know where the solutions to our problems lie, we refuse to pursue it with diligence and a genuine heart as Born-Again-Christians. Yperen does a good job explaining how Christians can find answers to their problems, integrating the scriptures. As true believers, the only source of our truth and our guidance is the Bible – God’s living word. Reading the Bible and sharing scriptures is a sure way of enhancing knowledge about the Bible and the Lord’s expectation of His people. For this reason, individuals must never give up the habit of meeting and fellowshipping together, even when difficult conflicts rock the chuck.
I find the book informative and practical despite its focus on religion. In the chapter about leading and forming Biblical community, the author reminds us of the importance of continuing with the spirit, as instructed in Galatians 3:3, where the Bible says, “after beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goals by human effort?” Conflicts in the church emerge and persist when leaders do things out of their knowledge and skills rather than depending on God (Smith, 2019, p. 313). The church’s identity led by those who believe in their strength is tied to the ego and self-esteem of those leaders and are likely to fail because they shift from being places of spiritual nourishments to performance-based institutions where leaders judge others based on their achievement of specific goals.
Before reading this book, I did not know that most Christians hold false notions about conflict. These ideas follow the extreme right and left-handed views of God and the church. While left-handed believers see God as all-loving and all-caring, right-handed believers see God as omnipotent (Van Yperen, 2008, p. 91). Both views are problematic because the first discourages any thought or talk about conflict in the church, while the second views conflict as necessary to separate the sheep from the goat. Both positions have Biblical bucking, as conflict can be God-purposed. Peace is God-given, and Christians should be struggling against the powers of darkness, not against each other. We can eliminate conflict by dealing with our need-based self-absorbed attitudes and actions.
The author also raises important points when talking about the different responders in a conflict situation. When conflict occurs in churches, congregants may respond passively, evasively, defensively, and aggressively. As the author distinguishes peacekeeping and peacemaking, it becomes apparent that passive responders endure conflict inwardly. They submit to or remain silent about a disagreement or offense. Passive responders tend to believe that all conflict is wrong and avoid it by remaining silent about it.
It is better to be assertive, resistant, and non-compliant to sort out some differences in the church. When people talk about the problems they experience, they create an avenue for communication to address these issues and prevent them from occurring again in the future. Passive responses to conflict prolong conflicts because users cover up the truth to protect themselves or others from being hurt. Being fearful is also one of the reasons people keep quiet or silent during a conflict. As an obstacle to attaining peace, fear affects all church members, including the senior leadership. Leaders called by God should not be afraid because the Lord our God will be with them in everything they do and everywhere they go (Joshua 1:9). The leaders must be trusting, faithful, and capable of showing others direction.
It is also possible to find evasive responders in church. Given the church’s position in the community, it is common. Many people believe that since the church is the model of the truth and the only guidance to reality and better living, participating in a conflict is setting a bad example. The Lord commands every Christian to be the light of the world in Mathew 5:14. Christians take this command seriously, but they forget that evading conflicts is worse than solving them. It causes the person to lose touch with their feelings, forcing them to accept the lie rather than acknowledge the hurt. Some evasive responders cannot express or accept love and affection due to the hurt caused by conflicts they do not address (Van Yperen, 2008, p.126). By highlighting this issue, the author does a good job of informing the readers about the importance of remaining committed and loyal to a given cause. It shows the significance of creating an avenue for critical negotiations and an environment that allows each party to express itself openly without fear. Through negotiations, evasive responders will realize and appreciate the importance of building all relationships rather than only those that support them.
I also agree with the author that some conflicting parties are defensive while addressing issues of concern. They do not admit that they are wrong and worsen the situation. A defensive responder believes he or she is right and is unwilling and unable to accept divergent views and opinions. Whatever the course of a conflict is in society, it is important to ensure that the conflicting parties desist from being defensive, evasive, and passive. They should approach the problem the way it is and create an environment that allows for a critical and objective analysis of the situation, using the Bible as the guide. Christians must live under the Lordship of Jesus Christ, which calls for submitting totally to Him. Jesus has the answers for all the problems we may have, and we only need to call on Him and listen to his Commands. The goal is to forget what is behind, aim for what is ahead (Philippians 3:13), and build trusting and lasting relationships.
Once Christians have resolved conflicts, it is important to focus on peacekeeping. Although peacemaking is good, peacekeeping is more important because it ensures a lasting positive relationship between believers. The Bible says in Psalms 133:1, behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity. Christians should live like brothers and sisters at all times, which means solving problems when they occur and creating effective strategies for maintaining peace. It also involves addressing sin and using the Bible as the absolute guide for everything the Christian does. It is possible to live harmoniously and leave the heavy burden to Jesus, and He will make it light. Jesus knows our hearts and judges us fairly according to our deeds. Our only hope is in him because he never fails; he died for us.
Van Yperen’s book provides great advice on how to handle conflicts in the church and maintain harmony and unity for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. This work results from more than ten years of knowledge, experience, and work in resolving conflicts in churches. Being the representation of Jesus Christ, the church must lead by example to attract more people to the Kingdom. The author gives many alternatives churches can use to achieve this objective. The author does a perfect job organizing the content for anyone to read and follow. It was thoughtful of the author to begin the book with a description of the mess we are in, the root causes of these conflicts, and strategies for leading and forming biblical communities.
I agree with the author that all conflict is about leadership. Conflict in the church means that the pastor, priest, bishop, or any other leader of that community of believers has failed to provide guidance and direction to the congregants. Churches, like business organizations, need and rely on effective leaders to survive, grow, and expand (Smith, 2019, p.218). Ineffective church leaders cause problems by mismanaging resources, showing bias, disrespecting and mistreating others. The biblical view of conflict provided in the book explains why Christians must lead by example and how they can do that. I agree with the author that we cannot run away from conflict or hide from it as Christians.
It is also impossible for us to leave vindication for God, take conflict as a personal matter, or run away from the responsibility of peacekeeping (which is distinct from peacemaking). The information provided in this part of the book encourages me to take an active role in church matters and ensure peace prevails because it is the collective responsibility of all believers. We must also appreciate what the LORD has done by distinguishing between church conflict and counterfeit peace. Although Churches can become unhealthy, they can receive healing from God and retain their position as prospering communities of believers.
References
Van Yperen, J. (2008). Making peace: A guide to overcoming church conflict. Moody Publishers.
Smith, C. C. (2019). How the body of Christ talks: Recovering the practice of conversation in the Church. Brazos Press.