The essay was written to address the United States’ controversy to stop funding the World Health Organization (WHO). The purpose of the writing is fulfilled because the author provides a possible explanation of the current situation, which causes controversy. The essay structure is sensible in terms of intention, but the target audience is not exact; thus, there are several usage and style errors. The piece of writing has both strengths and weaknesses that will be evaluated further in the paper.
First of all, the text’s strength is the introduction of the issues: the statement presents how the specific action can have an impact on the entire world. Another strong point is the explanation of this problem’s importance at present. The author raises two perplexing questions that the country’s population expects to be answered and the reasons for these inquiries. Moreover, the writer provides some commentary on how the controversy may influence the citizens and organizations.
On the other hand, the article has several weaknesses that can be fixed to improve the essay and make the statement more structured. The writing idea does not have enough supporting material; for instance, the author states that the China government provided false information at the beginning of the pandemic. However, there is no clear evidence presented to demonstrate the truth. An additional weakness is that the contrary side of the issues has not been delivered, which is crucial for any essay. Arguments for and against the problems make the article more objective and show the writer’s involvement in the research.
Furthermore, there are numerous grammar, spelling, and punctuation mistakes in the text, making it less influential for a reader. To be more specific, the severe error is in the usage of the word “date” instead of “data” when the essayist writes about China’s statistics. As for grammar, the introduction sentence has an indirect word order, but it is not a question. An example of punctuation error can be as follows: the second paragraph’s sentence is divided into two parts: the first part starts on one line, the other continues in another passage. Overall, the sentences are clear, but some are too long and complicated for readers’ understanding.
While revising the article, the author can argue against his statement and explain the invalidity of the evidence. Moreover, the statistics or some specific data on Covid-19 or the amount of the USA’s WHO funding are sensible to be addressed in the essay. This change will support the writer’s point of view. Finally, the conclusion is worth revising; the author can add possible solutions to this controversy; this change will confirm the text’s importance and the current issue. As for general revision, the grammar, spelling, and punctuation must be rechecked, and all the errors must be corrected.
Summing up, the purpose of the essay writing is relevant and significant which is a big advantage. The article addresses the controversy that influences citizens and organizations and provides explanations of the current situation. However, there are several grammar errors and imperfections that can be revised. The detailed revision and the proposed changes will make the text more evident, remarkable, and straightforward.