Purpose of Dinner Etiquette
The point of Dinner Etiquette rules is to make you feel comfortable – not uncomfortable. Table manners play an essential part in creating a favorable impression. They are visible signals of the state of our manners and therefore are critical for professional success.
History of Dining Etiquette
People have gathered to dine together for thousands of years, leading to specific rules of decorum, beginning with the work of Platina da Cremona in 1474 titled Health and Enjoyment within decency. In 1507 Baldassare Castiglieno developed the, while Erasmus wrote A Treatise on Manners in 1526. Giovanni Dela Cosa developed the Galateo in 1555, and Robert de Blois created a collection of principles on proper table etiquette in the middle of the sixteenth century. In 1765 Antoine Le Courtin authored the Traite de Civilite. There are exciting accounts in Japanese, Chinese, and Arabic literature, as many of the customs in these cultures differ significantly from Western ones.
Types of Table Service
French service is one of the most lavish forms of fine dining, including French cart service and French banquet service. Russian service is similar to French cart service; servers prepare dishes at the tableside. American Style Service is most familiar with food cooked and plated in the kitchen before being served to the guest’s right. Guests are given a menu during butler service and invited to serve themselves from the tray.
Tableware and Etiquette for Specific Foods
Tableware
Eating utensils are given precise placement on the table for specific uses. Knives and spoons are placed to the guest’s right, while forks are to the left. In the United States, people cut their food and then transfer the fork from the left to the right hand, sometimes described as a zig-zag method. The Europeans leave the fork in the left hand to bring the food to the mouth.
Etiquette for Specific Foods
Various foods require specific treatment to eat correctly using certain utensils, dishes, and other items. Unique condiments or sauces must accompany some foods. Servers know the particular needs of different foods so people can eat them properly.
General Dining Rules
It is vital to observe the dress code as indicated on the invitation or suggested by the host/hostess and plan to arrive ten minutes early. Please bring a small hostess gift that can be served at the dinner party, although it is not a must. Wait for the host or hostess to sit down before sitting unless asked. The host provides a sitting order typically involving man-woman-man-woman with the women seated to the right of the men. A prayer can be observed before eating as it is a custom in some households. Sometimes a toast is offered instead of a prayer. In the end, tea or coffee is served to signify that the formal part of the evening is over. Guests may feel free to leave, after which a thank you note should be sent to the hostess.
Dining Etiquette Culture
Cultures have vastly different dining rules, from using no utensils to using many sets of utensils to ac- company various courses. Dining rules are not always consistent within a culture. The most common cuisines are Italian, Chinese, and Mexican, and more establishments offer Indian, Japanese, Middle Eastern, and other ethnic foods. European Dining Etiquette is similar to the etiquette in the United States. Chinese and Japanese dining use chopsticks, with typical food being rice, wheat, soy sauce, and tofu (bean curd). Indians are primarily vegetarians. Some use no eating utensils but eat with their right hand. Middle Eastern dining is traditional with washing hands and using the right hand only; often, no eating utensils are used.
Dining Etiquette in the United States
Use the silverware farthest from your plate first, then work your way in, using one utensil for each course. Eat to your left, drink to your right. Any food dish to the left is yours, and any glass to the right is yours. The salad fork is on to the extreme left, followed by the dinner fork. The soup spoon is on the extreme right, followed by the beverage spoon, salad knife, and dinner knife. The dessert spoon and fork are above the plate or brought out with the dessert.
Good Server Etiquette
Before dinner service begins, the dining room must be put in order by preparing dining tables, flatware, and tableware for service for smooth dinner service. As a fine dining server, you should be familiar with formal table settings that must be observed to entice the guests. The serving style used in formal dining represents the highest level of hospitality. It elevates the guest experience and makes fine dining memorable. Follow the appropriate steps in serving wine in the correct order to impress any wine enthusiast, and afterward, follow the proper guidelines for clearing the table. Server grooming and behavior must be flawless in a fine dining setting.
Good Table Manners
Place your napkin in your lap immediately upon sitting down. Unfold it while it is in your lap. Use the “outside-in” rule to tell which knife, fork, or spoon to use at the dinner table. Use utensils on the outside first and work your way in with each new course. Food is removed from the mouth in how it is put into the mouth. Food put into the mouth with a utensil is removed with a utensil. When fingers are used to eat food, the pit or bone is removed with fingers. Say, “Excuse me, please; I’ll be right back,” when leaving for the restroom. Going without a word is rude. To avoid leaving food on the rim of the vessel, make sure the mouth is free of food and blot the lips with a napkin before taking a sip of a beverage.
Tipping
The question of tipping is new for every meal. Tips should be based on the bills total before tax. A 10 percent tip is the least one should tip for adequate service. Below 10 percent indicates the server’s displeasure with the service. Fifteen percent is the standard tip for satisfactory service, although some tip more than that. The tip may be higher than 20 percent for excellent service. The tipper should indicate the division if servers are to split a tip. Fifteen to 20 percent of the nontax total is often given to the captain, but some slip them a $10 or $20 bill. Remember that people from outside the United States are not used to tipping.
References
Bharadwaj, A. (2016). Dining Etiquette and Aesthetics in the Early Mughal Period (1504–1605 CE). Research Journal of Humanities and Social Sciences, 7(1), 61. Web.
Flaherty, M. (2019). Architecture and the Art of Dining: The Performance of Dining in Early America. Volume 5, Number 2, 5(2). Web.
Kotschevar, L. H., & Luciani, V. (2006). Presenting Service: The Ultimate Guide for the Foodservice Professional, 2nd Edition. Wiley Global Education.
Yuan, J. J., Bauman, M. J., Ferns, B. H., Ebrahimzadeh, M., & Alshiha, A. A. (2022). Restaurant Dining Environment, Restaurant Formality and Dining Involvement in the Context of Memorable Dining Experiences (Mdes). Journal of Quality Assurance in Hospitality & Tourism, 1–28. Web.