Dividing household chores is one of the topics that all married couples discuss, which makes this issue relevant to most people. When individuals prefer not to express their negative feelings concerning their partner’s behavior, it often creates a critical situation. One person disregards their duties, stops thinking there is a need in their efforts, and takes the case for granted. Another person, in their turn, accumulates irritation and other negative feelings toward the partner, which makes the scandal or divorce inevitable. In all cases, there is a vital need to adequately react to the problem that bothers the person to reduce the stress level in family life and avoid possible serious conflicts.
Strategies
It is possible to propose four strategies that the spouse who has grieved by handling the burden of responsibilities could use to manage the conflict over chores and responsibilities more effectively. First, they might improve the dialogue between the husband and the wife and avoid conflict aggravation (Floyd, 2020). It is necessary to start by setting the correct orientations to help the person cope with household responsibilities. For example, creating a timetable is the first step in dividing household chores, allowing people to control their performance (Lamanna et al., 2020). In some cases, the individual does not intend to skip their own duties, but they forget about it. Their partner does not remind them of the household chores, thinking it is a conscious action that shows their attitude to family life. It is a mistake that family members can make because it aggravates the conflict that can be easily solved using the timetable and the open discussion of the issue.
The second strategy supposes understanding the things the person does not like doing. Some couples do not discuss these issues, and the person who hates dishwashing is assigned this responsibility (Lamanna et al., 2020). Therefore, listening to the partner is essential in understanding the individual’s priorities in the household chores division. The third way to approach the spouse to manage the conflict more effectively is by listening to them with empathy (Lamanna et al., 2020). Sometimes, the person has reasons to avoid household chores, but they do not think they need to explain them. For example, being too stressed at the workplace can lead to apathy and a lack of desire to do anything around the house. The fourth strategy to manage the conflict in this situation is praising the partner for their efforts (Lamanna et al., 2020). Gratitude is a crucial issue in relationships that influences the emotional attitude of the person to the things they do. There is the possibility that the spouse thinks that all their efforts are wrong because they are constantly criticized for inability to complete the tasks on the appropriate level.
Response
The nonpracticing spouse should understand that the dissatisfaction of their partner with family life is a serious concern. Effective responses to the accusations of the unequal division of household chores are critical issues in supporting relationships. First, the partner should compromise when possible and understand that their spouse suffers from this situation. In this case, the second variant of behavior is to acknowledge the right of the partner to disagree with the current situation (Floyd, 2020). In the discussed topic, the spouses agreed to divide the household responsibilities equally, and the nonpracticing partner is wrong. Even though there can be objective reasons to avoid household chores, respecting the spouse’s opinion is vital (Floyd, 2020). In addition, the dialogue between the partners will help to understand the details surrounding the irritation of one partner and the nonperformance of another. Therefore, there is a need to start communication and express all concerns in a friendly manner.
The nonparticipating spouse should acknowledge the adverse consequences of their conduct. For instance, they should understand their partner’s needs, who can be unsatisfied with family life due to the aspects they do not articulate. The egoistic position is one of the most harmful variants of conduct in this situation because it leads to the alienation of spouses (Floyd, 2020). Another critical detail in the discussed case is the constant work on improving personal boundaries that allow the spouse to acknowledge their faults and avoid conflicts (Floyd, 2020). Individuals with a good understanding of personal boundaries will see that their spouse is dissatisfied with the situation and will try to restore equity in sharing the responsibilities. Therefore, the nonpracticing partner should think about their behavior and change it to preserve harmony in their family life.
Conclusion
Unsolved disputes and the inability of the married couple to manage the problem lead to a decreased level of marital satisfaction and mental health issues and increases divorce risks. The household burden is one of the most popular topics that lead to stress in married life, which makes it critical to apply the strategies for effective conflict resolution. It is vital to remember that empathy and respect for another person’s desires and problems are essential issues of healthy relationships. When the problem is disregarded for a long time, the conflict becomes more serious, and it is more challenging to find a solution.
References
Floyd, K. (2020). Interpersonal communication (4th ed.). McGraw-Hill Education.
Lamanna, M. A., Riedmann, A., & Stewart, S. D. (2020). Marriages, families, and relationships: Making choices in a diverse society. Cengage Learning.