The issue of trust, a well as the process of getting to know each other, is a crucial part of marriage. However, when constrained by the presence of multiple rigid standards and expectations set by society, a married couple is likely to experience severe distress, causing the relationships to disrupt and, in the worst-case scenario, to dissipate. In “A Nice Indian Boy” by Madhuri Shekar, the scene in which Megha tells about her experience with an arranged marriage, the importance of trust as the ability to show the partner one’s vulnerabilities is explored in depth. By using a combination of humor and drama, the narrator reveals the unique way of how individual identity is shaped in marriage, and how each partner contributes to the other’s personal growth.
The examination of identity and its development in the excerpt under analysis becomes especially meaningful when considering the setting thereof, namely, the context of an arranged marriage. As the piece in question shows, Megha had very little idea of what marriage was at the time, as well as how her identity was going to evolve in its environment. Notably, the narrator acknowledges that “It was difficult in the beginning. All marriages are” (Shekar 70). Therefore, the identity conflict is established quite clearly and straightforwardly in the identified piece. Particularly, the guilt and shame that Megha experiences after failing the expectations of a dutiful wife as she was brought up to be in the conservative community become apparent.
However, the next turn of personal development occurs as the author introduces a new element that fuels the growth of both Megha and her husband. Specifically, the subversion of the traditional gender roles within the family becomes a focal point of the narrative in the excerpt under analysis: “He was even making gulab jamun” (Shekar 71). One could argue that Shekar leaving the task of changing the status quo to Megha’s husband makes the latter slightly weaker as a character, yet this line of thinking does not entirely coincide with the cultural background in which the story is placed.
Moreover, given the fact that the notion of personal identity is examined in the realm of marriage in this excerpt, it makes sense to consider how Megha and her husband have managed the specified obstacle as a couple. Thus, the solution that they have reached displays their growth both as individuals and as spouses in the context of their culture. The resulting portrayal of individuality bursting through the screen of traditionalism and established gender roles leave a rather inspiring impression: “I never had to cook again in my life!” (Shekar 71). Even though the situation portrayed in this excerpt is expected to be comedic, the drama of searching for one’s own identity and the need to reconcile one’s individuality with the reality of the arranged marriage contribute to the poignancy of this scene.
Combining humor and drama, Shekar explores how an individual identity evolves when subverting cultural expectations in an attempt at supporting a partner in a marriage. Although the excerpt in question centers on the humorous aspect of Megha’s story explicitly, it communicates important values such as the ability to compromise. As a result, while retaining the traditional cultural values, one can grow as a person and accept the faults of one’s partner, at the same time supporting the latter’s development as well. Incorporating wisdom and a rather peculiar example of gender roles subversion, the specified excerpt provides grounds for a rather thorough analysis of the idea of personal growth in the family context.
Work Cited
Shekar, Madhuri. “A Nice Indian Boy.” Monologues for Actors of Color: Women, edited by Roberta Uno, Routledge, 2016, pp. 70-71.