Youth Worker (YW): Hi, Colin. I want to speak about your decision to become emo and your future goals in life. Could you, please, tell me what is emo for you and why did you decide to be a part of an emo culture?
Colin: Well, there is no clear definition of the concept of emo, but this culture is associated with lyrical and emotional music and dark clothes. However, it is much more than dark clothes and emotional music. Being emo means being free from rules and stereotypes adults set in this world. Emo culture is an anti-culture that helps youth stand against these rules.
YW: Okay, but why did you decide to become emo?
Colin: I am sixteen years old, but my parents still consider me as a child. But I have my personal point of view, and I do not want adults to disregard my opinion. I know that in some countries, people at the age sixteen have the right to vote and can live on their own and even quit school. They have more freedom than many other teenagers. I want to have this freedom too, to make my own choices without asking a permission. That is why I am a part of an emo-culture.
YW: Thank you, Colin. I have another question. What is it like to be emo in your environment? Is it associated only with black hair, dark clothes and some music stuff?
Colin: Although many people still think that emo means wearing dark clothes and listening to alternative rock, it is not only about that. I am not socially outcasted or bullied at school because of my appearance. Today, young people do not judge each other by appearances anymore. However, being emo means being depressive and strange for many older people. Teachers and unknown adults often ask me whether I feel alright and whether I need help. They give me advice on how to get better. But I do not need their advice. It is just my choice to be an emo, and it has nothing to do with depression or any other mental health disorder.
YW: Okay, but why do many emo girls and boys look so sad and listen to depressive music?
Colin: We like feelings, either positive or negative, any feelings. I am a creative person, and I write poetry, like to take pictures of this beautiful world, and don’t like to look like other people. Emo youth does not listen to depressive music only. We listen to different musical genres, and it is not the music that is important but the lyrics. The truth is that most of the deep and meaningful songs sound sad, but it does not mean that they are depressive and painful.
YW: Do you feel valued in your environment?
Colin: No, I often feel lonely, and I do not feet in anywhere.
YW: Why do you feel so?
Colin: Because I have different ideals in relation to the world, religion, politics, and other important spheres of life.
YW: What are these ideals?
Colin: I think that all people are lying about everything. They are often dishonest and unfair, and they will judge you if you express your emotions and feelings openly. That is why I value acceptance and honesty, and I believe that I will regenerate and go to a better world after death.
YW: Do you want to die?
Colin: Everyone will die eventually, but I do not have suicidal thoughts if you mean whether I have such ideas.
YW: Do you often think about death and pain?
Colin: Yes, I think about death and heartache because these themes motivate me to think about the sense of life. When we consider death and dying, we begin to appreciate life more.
YW: Does it mean that you are disappointed with life?
Colin: Partially, yes. I believe that every person is born to be free. However, no one is free in a world full of rules and constraints.
YW: Tell me about your family. Do you feel that your family members love and support you?
Colin: My parents are too busy to spend time with me, and they have always been busy. They work too much, and they do not understand me. When I was a kid, I dreamed of spending the whole weekend with my parents, but they never found time for me. I felt lonely and invisible, so I began to look for support in music and poetry.
YW: I see… Did you experience violence in your family?
Colin: No, it is just the ignorance and lack of communication that makes me feel lonely.
YW: If your parents started to spend more time with you, would you change your emo-style?
Colin: I do not know. I am not ready to change my lifestyle right now. I do not believe that something will change in my life in the nearest future.
YW: What about your friends? Do you have any friends?
Colin: I have several friends, and they are those people who fully understand and accept my worldview.
YW: How do you behave in front of your friends and in front of your schoolmates or strangers?
Colin: I am open and bright with my friends because I trust them. However, I am antisocial and reserved in front of other people.
YW: Why?
Colin: Because I feel that they are insincere. I do not want to communicate with phony people and those who consider me depressed and weird.
YW: Do not you think that your reserved and antisocial behavior makes them believe that you are weird?
Colin: Maybe. But I do not care. I have my own opinion, and I am not interested in what my schoolmates think of me.
YW: How do you express your personality to the world?
Colin: I use social networking sites. The Internet is the only place where I can express myself openly and show the world that I am a deep personality and my emotions are meaningful.
YW: But there are many haters on social networking sites; how do you deal with them?
Colin: I block them. I do not want to clog my personal page with unnecessary and negative information. I like to share my emotions with those people who will understand and support me.
YW: Thank you, Colin. And now I have one last question. Tell me about your future plans: what do you want to do in life?
Colin: I do not know yet, but I would like to change this world for the better. I want to spread a message that remains unnoticed among adults. Instead of isolating young people, who belong to different subcultures, and trying to subvert them, adults should try to understand them and accept their identities. No one should feel ashamed of expressing their emotions, and if emo decides to express his feelings through clothes and music, let him do it without judging him.
YW: Thank you, Colin; I understand your point now.