Summary
Overprotective parenting is one of the common strategies that some people use to offer guidance and support to their children. It involves paying close attention to what a child does at home and school to understand their weaknesses and strengths and offer protection when it is necessary. The study has shown that this strategy has both positive and negative consequences. The position of the researcher, based on the facts gathered from various sources, is that benefits far outweigh the challenges. Helicopter parents can identify challenges that their children go through. They are willing to offer them support, guidance, and protection so that they can lead successful lives. Parents should understand that although helicopter parenting is beneficial, they should appreciate the fact that these children need some form of freedom in their lives.
Introduction
Overprotective parenting, popularly known as helicopter parenting, is one of the most common strategies that people use to raise their children. McGinley (2018) defines helicopter parenting as an approach where a parent or a guardian gives extremely close attention to their children’s overall experiences, especially in learning institutions. They are committed to the success of their children. As such, they spend a considerable amount of time monitoring what the child is doing both at home and school intending to offer any assistance that would help them excel. The current consensus on helicopter parenting and social views are that it is an effective way of monitoring the progress of a child and understanding challenges that they may be going through. However, some experts have warned that over-parenting may have a negative impact on the social, physical, educational, and even emotional wellbeing of the child. In this paper, the researcher seeks to discuss the statement that the real problem with helicopter parents is that there are not enough of them. The researcher will critically analyze this statement using relevant empirical studies and parenting theories.
Review of the Literature
The argument that the problem with helicopter parents is that there are not enough of them shows support for this approach of raising children. It holds the view that if society could have enough of such parents, then it would be easy to raise socially responsible children who know how to manage their emotions and undertake responsibilities assigned to them. This parenting strategy involves is a hands-on approach where one is keen to understand what the child is doing whether they are at home or in school (Schiffrin & Liss, 2017). The goal of such individuals is to ensure that their children do not get negatively influenced by peers, perform poorly at school, or engage in activities that may be detrimental to their safety or normal development. The strategy has both positive and negative implications which are worth discussing at this stage.
Positive Implications
Helicopter parenting helps in ensuring that a child gets the support he or she needs both at home and in school. According to a study by Reed et al. (2016), the presence of a parent in a child’s normal development is important. The researchers in this article interviewed a group of college students to understand their views about helicopter parenting. Their study revealed that such parents always understand the challenges that their children go through in school. Most of the time, the child would not need to provide a lengthy explanation when they need material support from such a parent. Their constant engagement with their children means that they easily understand when the child needs their support.
Bullying remains one of the most common challenges that children have to encounter at school despite the effort that stakeholders have put in place to fight the vice. Helicopter parents are in the best position to know when their children are bullied in any way. They always ask about the experiences that the child had in school and the challenges they face. They would visit their children at school just to ensure that they are coping well. Earle and LaBrie (2016) argue that taking such steps help a child to overcome any emotional challenges that they face. When a child is facing an emotional challenge at school or home, they tend to change their behavior. A helicopter parent will immediately notice the change of behavior. They will know when the child needs support at home or school. Such parents encourage their children to openly discuss challenges that they face so that they can be guided and protected appropriately.
The amount of children who currently prefer online games and online communication to outdoor activities is growing. The problem is that they can be exposed to cyber-bullying and cybercriminals who may be interested in taking advantage of them. Some children have committed suicide because of the problem of bullying and lack of proper support from home (Janning, 2019). Others have fallen prey to online predators that lure them with money or emotional support. Children who have withdrawn parents are likely to fall prey to such online attacks because they lack the support and protection they need. A child with a helicopter parent is more secure as their parents will always be present to offer them support.
Negative Implications
Helicopter parenting is known to have challenges, especially when the parent fails to understand the boundary that they should not cross. One of the main challenges of this strategy is that these parents rarely allow their children to learn from their mistakes. According to Reed et al. (2016), one of the best lessons that one can have in life is to fail at doing something. They learn about disappointments and the pain that comes with them. They get to know that one does not always succeed at everything. The overprotection that these children experience makes them highly vulnerable to failures when they become adults. As they get into adulthood, they retain the desire to succeed at everything, and when they fail to meet the expectations, they get devastated more easily than those who had learned about failures in life.
Overprotective parenting may be detrimental to the physical, emotional, educational, and social development of a child. When a parent is constantly scared that the child may be subjected to physical harm when they engage in outdoor games, they will ensure that they only go out under adult supervision. The problem is that these adults may not have time to supervise these activities, which would mean the child would rarely go out (Sigelman et al., 2019). Such regulations also deny the child the opportunity to socialize with their peers and learn about ways of life. Some of these parents would not hesitate to help their children with their homework, hoping that they are helping out. In reality, they deny these children to make a personal effort to solve problems that they face. McGinley (2018) explains that overprotective parents sometimes fail to understand that they may not be permanently present in the lives of their children forever. A child who gets constant emotional attention from a parent even on minor issues that they can deal with maybe devastated when the support is not available.
Reasons Why Some Parents Use Helicopter Parenting and Alternatives
It is necessary to analyze theories and concepts that can help explain the reasons why some parents opt to use helicopter parenting. Attachment theory is one of the concepts that can help in explaining the popularity of this parenting approach. According to Reed et al. (2016), the theory holds that some parents tend to have a close attachment with their children. The parent-child bond can be so strong that one would constantly be interested in knowing about the wellbeing of the child to ensure that they do not feel insecure, upset, or afraid. They want their children to feel protected and cared for at all times. This theory explains that individuals who develop such strong bonds with their offspring always have the fear that without their constant guidance, the child may go astray or fail to achieve specific goals (Doepke & Zilibotti, 2019). As such, their over-involvement with their children is motivated by the desire to guide and protect their young ones.
Social learning theory is another concept that can help explain why some parents opt to embrace overprotective parenting as a strategy to care for their children. This theory holds that new behavior or knowledge is gained through observation and imitation of what others do (Reed et al., 2016). The goal of a parent to maintain a close relationship with the child is to ensure that they can be role models and influence their development. The theory also explains that reward and punishment are effective reinforcements that can enhance learning (Janning, 2019). Using this argument, these parents would monitor the progress of their children and reward them accordingly when they excel in school or co-curriculum activities. On the other hand, they would be punished if they fail to behave in a way that their parents expect. These theories explain why some parents consider using helicopter parenting. However, they need to know that there are alternatives that take into consideration the negative and positive factors discussed above. Reed et al. (2016) believe that the best alternative is for the parents to be protective and understanding of their children, but in a way that gives them the freedom to experience life.
Conclusion
Overprotective parenting involves paying close attention to what a child does both at home and in school. Such a parent aims to ensure that their child is safe, feels cared for, and understands what is expected of them at all times. The study shows that this approach has both negative and positive implications. The problem with this strategy is that it leaves little room for the child to make an independent decision about their lives. However, its benefits outweigh these challenges as the child will always get the unconditional love of the parent. When using this strategy, the parent should remember that it is beneficial to allow a child to sometimes make independent decisions.
References
Doepke, M., & Zilibotti, F. (2019). Love, money & parenting: How economics explains the way we raise our kids. Princeton University Press.
Earle, A. M., & LaBrie, J. W. (2016). The upside of helicopter parenting: Engaging parents to reduce first-year student drinking. Journal of Student Affairs Research and Practice, 53(3), 319-330.
Janning, M. Y. (Ed.). (2019). Contemporary parenting and parenthood: From news headlines to new research. Praeger.
McGinley, M. (2018). Can hovering hinder helping? Examining the joint effects of helicopter parenting and attachment on prosocial behaviors and empathy in emerging adults. The Journal of Genetic Psychology, 179(2), 102-115.
Reed, K., Duncan, J.M., Lucier-Greer, M., Fixelle, C., & Ferraro, A. J. (2016). Helicopter parenting and emerging adult self-efficacy: Implications for mental and physical health. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 25, 3136–3149.
Schiffrin, H. H., & Liss, M. (2017). The effects of helicopter parenting on academic motivation. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 26(1), 1472-1480.
Sigelman, C. K., Linda, D. G., Rider, E. A., Cunial, K. (2019). Life span human development with online study tools 12 months. Cengage Learning Australia.