Health Grief: Comparison of the Two Approaches to Healthy Grief

Topic: Health Words: 874 Pages: 3

Grief is one of the strongest and overwhelming emotions inherent to people as a result of some kind of loss, misunderstanding, or sorrow. Many people admit that grief is a natural reaction of people, and this is why it is always interesting and educative to investigate this emotion and define a variety of its aspects. There are many forms of grief when people become “angry that they had been singled out to be stricken by a terminal illness” or “try to postpone death as long as possible” (Worth, 2005, p. 2).

Elizabeth Kübler-Ross is one of the most famous psychiatrists who made an attempt to evaluate grief and define its main stages. Another powerful attempt to study grief and learn more about it were made many years ago by the creators of the Bible, and the Book of Job in particular. These are two different approaches to the same issue which are always interesting to investigate, compare, and study. In this table, the two approaches to healthy grief will be analyzed.

stages of grief	elizabeth kÜbler-ross	the book of job
About grief	She connects closely the ideas of guilt, shame, and grief and admits that all these processes are supported by the feeling of anger. People are able to cope with grief should just take the right steps (Kübler-Ross, 2009).	Grief is a result of human mistakes, lies, and wrong actions, and people should not be angry with challenges but powerful enough to overcome them. According to Job, there is no place for grief as it is just the period when “my soul is weary of my life” (The Book of Job, 2006, 10:1)
Denial	The period when a person in grief tries to refuse all facts and proofs of the current situation and use the idea of unawareness as the strongest protective mechanism. People are not always ready to accept terrible news; this is why their grief begins in the form of denial.	Job does not find it necessary to deny facts and accept everything as it is. He is not in grief as other people may believe, what he is doing is accept God’s requirements and follow his own beliefs.
Anger	A grieving person may use anger as another more powerful protective mechanism. Emotional upset may frustrate people’s plans so that they are angry with their relatives who abandon them or with an illness that takes a close person’s life, etc.	Job is the brightest example of how people may cope with anger. There is no need to be anger with something or somebody. The only right thing is to accept everything as it is and do nothing but pray for people who believe in God and for those who mistakenly drop their faiths.
Bargaining	After the most emotional stages of grief passed, the time to evaluate the situation comes. Is it still possible to improve the communication with God or other idols that influence human life? Is it still possible to befriend with God and rely on his protection?	Job considers this step as one of the most crucial because the success of this step defines the success of future life. A person should be powerful enough to ask for help, to define personal mistakes, to evaluate the situation, and God’s assistance is important in this period.
Depression	“When a major loss is experiences, the normal way to react is with intense distress or depression” (Wortman & Silver, 1989, p. 350). According to Kübler-Ross (2009), it is natural to be upset and to feel regret or some kind of fear because it is the main sign that a person starts adapting to the reality and comprehends what is happening around.	There is no place for depression in the Job’s story. If a person realizes what is happening around, there is no need to regret about something. It is another chance to re-evaluate life and understand what goes wrong.
Acceptance	This step usually depends on the situation. The way of how the process of acceptance passes depends on person’s readiness to accept the reality, to comprehend what has already happened, and what needs to be done. If there is enough time to evaluate the grief, a person may reach this stage without anger or some other feelings. It is not the happy stage, so, people should not confuse the idea of acceptance with an idea of happiness after a disaster (death or illness) bothers a person. Medical staff should understand that people are in need of some explanations and help, and doctors as well as nurses and clergies should provide this support in time.	Job was ready to accept truth from the very beginning when he faced first challenges. The story of Job proves that there is no necessity of the all above-mentioned stages because a person is able to achieve understanding at once. The only thing that is required is faith. A person should believe that there are some supernatural powers which may help people survive in this world. The success of Job lied into the fact that he understood that God could not provide all people with his support and care, this is why people had to be strong enough to find powers and courage to cope with challenges independently.

Reference List

Kübler-Ross, E. (2009). On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy and Their Own Families. Abingdon, Oxon: Routledge.

The Book of Job. (2006). World English Bible. Web.

Worth, R. (2005). Elisabeth Kübler-Ross: Encountering Death and Dying. Philadelphia: Chelsea House Publishers.

Wortman, C. B. & Silver, R.C. (1989). The Myths of Coping with Loss. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology 57.3, 349-357.