Introduction
Raising a child with good morals and ethics in a world full of chaos, uncertainty, and inhumanity is a challenging task for parents. It is even more challenging for parents who lack the appropriate tools for parenting. A child’s behavior development is influenced by many factors, including social and cultural practices, but the parent’s behavior and parenting have the most impact on how they turn out. The first five to seven years of a child are said to be plastic. That is, it is a phase in the life cycle where the children are open to social influences and can be shaped to whatever shape. A parent is the first and most available teacher to the child. Therefore, whatever is taught to the child at this stage could be what they carry throughout their lives. According to the Bible, “train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it”-Proverbs 22:6. Therefore, parents are to blame for their children’s acts of crime such as theft or vandalism, except when the children are suffering from mental health issues.
Main body
Most children do not just steal; they have forces that drive them to. Young children below the age of four do not steal; they do not have a sense of belonging at this stage. However, by the time they get to elementary school, they already know it is wrong to take what is not theirs. Often, children at this stage steal because they do not have self-control. A preteen or teen will steal for three main reasons: (i) to satisfy a need or stealing to replace parental love, respect, attention, and affection, (ii) they have received a direct or indirect approval for stealing (iii) to attack their parents by embarrassing them or forcing them to pay more attention to them. Whatever the reason for stealing, how the parent reacts to it determines whether or not the behavior continues.
According to law, it is upon a parent to ensure that their children have responsible behavior, respect, honesty, and self-control. This can only be done through appropriate and consistent discipline, which enables them to understand the consequences of their actions. The method used to discipline a child determines what they become. For instance, corporal punishment is popular among some parents. This method is instant, but in the long term, the children become rebellious, which is shown through acts such as stealing. Corporal punishment is a form of maltreatment, especially if the child perceives it as harsh (Chong & Yeo, 2018). According to the Social learning theory, children who have been victims of maltreatment learn and adopt patterns of violent or other criminal behaviors via the process of imitating and modeling. Children perceive these behaviors as resulting in positive outcomes. That is why a high school student will vandalize a teacher’s car to gain the attention of their parents, who would otherwise not show up to school.
Laws have imposed legal responsibility on parents and guardians for any criminal acts of minors in their charge. These laws assume that the reason why minors commit crimes is that their parents have failed to exercise proper control and oversight. Therefore, the states punish them for inspiring them to exert the required control to keep their children from breaking the law. They are mostly not punished for what they have they have done, but for what they haven’t been able to do. For instance, the parent of a juvenile supermarket thief is not charged for theft but for allowing their child to do it by not exercising proper control as a parent.
Parents in the modern world are busier chasing financial freedom than ever before. Some would argue that today’s children are living more comfortable lives than their parents did as a result of their parents working extra hours. However, in the process, parents end up depriving their children of what matters the most; time, company, and creating memories. Research shows that children with busy schedules or nonstandard work schedules develop behavioral problems (Wang & Dix, 2017). Long hours of work cause stress and anxiety, which can then be transferred to the child. For instance, when a child performs poorly in school, instead of the parent encouraging the child and providing alternative solutions to help them improve, they might end up criticizing them. This could send the children into a depressive space from feelings of guilt, being a burden, and being unloved.
Busy or nonstandard work schedules deprive parents of enough time to meet their children’s emotional needs. They either take longer or do not at all notice changes happening in their children’s lives (Wang & Dix, 2017). In the teen years especially, children are vulnerable to a mix of new emotions due to the developments happening in their bodies. If parents do not pay attention to them, they feel confused and neglected and require parental guidance and assurance. If this lacks, then they begin to vandalize or steal as a way of calling out for help.
However, a parent of a child suffering from any mental health condition cannot be blamed for their child’s behavior. How the child behaves is usually out of the parent’s or the child’s control. For example, children suffering from conduct kleptomania are unable to control their urge to steal. An example is a case study used by Biomy (2020) in his research on cognitive behavioral therapy for kleptomania. A 20-year-old was sued for stealing as a minor from others and was still stealing uncontrollably. There are other mental conditions, such as disruptive disorder, where a child loses control over their emotions and behavior and ends up harming themselves or others. Linke et al. (2020) use a case study of an 11-yarl old with severe irritability and a primary diagnosis of the disruptive disorder. Oppositional deficit disorder (ODD) also causes a child to defy requests from adults most of the time and engage in behaviors to deliberately annoy others. Blumberg (2017) describes a case of ODD that progressed into adulthood but had caused numerous legal problems to the patient. The illnesses mentioned are natural phenomena that the parent has no control over. They can, therefore, not be blamed for the actions that come as a result.
Although parents have no control over mentally unstable children, it is still their responsibility to learn how to control these children. Once they realize their children are sick, they ought to seek help and guidance from professionals. Some of the illnesses mentioned above can be healed; how they behave afterward depends on what they were taught in their earlier years. Even with mental issues, they should be taught that bad behavior has consequences, that way, most of them will regulate their behaviors.
Conclusion
Children steal mainly because they are trying to compensate for something they lack in their lives. Children are fully dependent on their parents for physical, mental, and emotional needs. Therefore, if this is lacking, then they are likely to steal or vandalize to seek the attention that they require. Parents are responsible for ensuring that their children are well taken care of and remain disciplined. Children’s bad behavior is a reflection of their parents’ bad parenting. However, parents cannot be blamed for their children’s bad behavior if they are mentally unstable. Behaviors as a result of mental illnesses are a natural phenomenon and therefore out of control of both the parents and the children until they are treated.
References
Biomy, S. (2020). Cognitive behavioral therapy for kleptomania: A case study. International neuropsychiatric disease journal, 41-50. Web.
Blumberg, B. (2017). Oppositional defiant disorder: a case report. Fortunejournals.com. Web.
Chong, C., & Yeo, K. (2018). The residue effects of parental corporal punishment on young adults’ psychological adjustment: evidence from Malaysia. SAGE Open, 8(1), 215824401875728. Web.
Li, J., Ohlbrecht, H., Pollmann-Schult, M., & Habib, F. (2020). Parents’ nonstandard work schedules and children’s social and emotional wellbeing: A mixed-methods analysis in Germany. Journal Of Family Research, 32(2), 330-356. Web.
Linke, J., Kircanski, K., Brooks, J., Perhamus, G., Gold, A., & Brotman, M. (2020). Exposure-based cognitive-behavioral therapy for disruptive mood dysregulation disorder: an evidence-based case study. Behavior Therapy, 51(2), 320-333. Web.
Wang, Y., & Dix, T. (2017). Mothers’ depressive symptoms and children’s externalizing behavior: Children’s negative emotionality in the development of hostile attributions. Journal Of Family Psychology, 31(2), 214-223. Web.